Saturday, November 28, 2009

One Blood

Take the road on your wheelchair
Roll it out tonight!
Cause there's only one option for us right now
One of us got to get down
If you don't hear my call for help
You're in another world boy!
I've lost my faith in the pure, blue skied summertime

I've been lying awake at night thinking
That son of a fuck dragged me down and now I'm lost
Can you help me find my long way back home?
The traffic lights are even dimmer then my past
Give me a sign, some kind of religion, Allah, Buddha
I don't care, I don't dare to choose one sign, one heart, one feeling, one God

Coz it's one blood floating in the stream
It's one blood floating in the stream...

Every day that goes I need more and more people around me
People I can rely to
Not those fucking sellouts I read about in the papers
Whose only hope are equally dumb consumers
I'm up on that stage, I'm up here, you're down there
Does that make me more important? More intelligent?
More likely to live that happy standard life your parents set you out to?

I don't know
- You're in a position most kids dream of
I don't know
- You can be as weak as the man sleeping on newspapers
I don't know
- You're still set out to tell the dirty man's story
I don't know
- Other people are talking and thinking about you as we speak
But I've seen them out there as well
- Yeah, but you don't know them do you!?
No but they don't know me either
- Well, they think they do!
They think they do!
THEY THINK THEY DO!!!

So what do I need to get through the day?
- ONE BLOOD!
What do I need to break on through the night?
- ONE HEART!
What do I do to get along with these, these fools?
- ONE SOUL!
Why don't I just go back to the steal factory? Or the warehouse?
Or the railroad? Get the fuck out of here, get the fuck out of music,
back to the days when we had one heart, one brain, one soul, one God

Coz it's one blood floating in the stream
It's one blood floating in the stream
Coz it's one blood floating in the stream
It's one blood floating in the stream
Coz it's one blood floating in the stream
It's one blood floating in the stream

-MD

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Let it out





That was a relief....fuuhh~~~


Sunday, November 22, 2009

sucker punch

I got nothing to distract me from the pain and all i can see is your words.



I thought i get over it, then a sudden flash back...

I guess i was being in denial...though i think you are truly mastering the art of making me wanting and needing you even more...



Your playlist would be the only cure for now...


Nightmare of the past

I'm sorry about this, it felt so sick inside and i had to vomit it all out...

So i guess now its all connected. I was truly blinded.

Now i know why you act the way you act. My first guess was right it was as it is. Its not as you were merajuk or such. It was for real, you act like that and you meant it that way.

There is a reason why i saw all the part and eventually solve it out.

You ignore me for the first week because you were actually on with the guy. Unfortunately i made a stupid mistake by removing you from a friend list for a teaser and you had a breakthrough. You said things happen for a reason straight away to show that it was my fault that you are being that way and off you go. One month of ignorance without any compassion shows the greed and betray. Not to mention the hurtful message that you wrote to me, you said that I'm nobody and you said you are with someone else which you are and also the post you made in your blog with the mocking up etc. I doubt you were merajuk, its too much. You want to get rid of me so you can get your dream. The saddest thing was your art piece. I really thought you made it for me, its the reason why I'm still here. I even did a cover of the song...heh. I was too blind even though my instinct told me the real thing at my first sight. The guy were also in my friend list so you know how i found out. The artwork was obviously to impress him base on his previous comment. The symbol and such, no doubt. You love him don't you? I know you do. I'm nothing compare to him.

So time pass and suddenly you discover that the guy already got his own and now you regret and start to chase me back again. The date of the piece and post and such makes it too obvious, i can see the time-line in my mind so clearly. You start to write about me again in your blog after you find out about his status and it was cleverly written that only myself know about it. Coax and coax and coax with related music and some tease and you are such a coward for not admitting it. Yeah you are a p*ssy anyway...

I wish i don't have the capacity to solve it but unfortunately its not to my favor and i wish i would let it remain as a mystery but now I can't stop thinking about it again and again and again...and i can't stop painting your darker character in my mind...

Not to mention how you made me piss all the time.

You know who you are bitch. I was too blind, I don't want to see you effing face ever again. I'm honestly saying its over. I got no reason to love in the first place but...

A lesson you got to learn. If you get rid of a person for the sake of your dream, that mean you don't deserve that person, and don't you ever look back because you never deserve that person.

You don't belong here. Shhoosshh sshoosshh..



...wait...wait...

The only way for you to fix this is to prove my assumption is wrong...

Please prove me wrong...hun because i can't stop thinking about it. It made me feel sick...

I will wait after its all over though and please tell me every single thing....




.....or maybe i should forget it all because i'm myself not perfect...

haadduuuuuuuuhhh~~~~





i love you so much momoface...

Friday, November 20, 2009

Painful Truth

I don't know, my mind will keep calculating the unsolved matter even thought if it was like six month ago. Have you ever fall for a person who were unfortunately also start to fall for another person? She gave you hint and stuff to show you that she was interested and you start to had feeling with her but then she suddenly change for a reason, a reason that you know but she wouldn't admit. What makes things worse was the sudden manner. It was like "Fuck you, i don't like you, i had nothing to do with you, I fancy this new guy, go to hell", mocked you with her friends and then she ignore you like tungol and the only way to communicate with her is like this and a couple of days earlier she was actually like "Woaw, bile nak belanje ice-cream?" with ;) and "more".

Oh maann...only god knows the pain. She hate me so much for admitting my feeling just when her heart with others and perhaps because i remove her from FB and myspace with a "fuck u" soon after which i think she glad because I was the one who was holding her back. If i recall back the moment, it was like one of the worst moment in my entire life period, just in front of my 10 Gb hardisk kabooom! moment.

It get even worse when you actually know what was going on. For example "que pensez-vous?". I think she look back just because she find out that the guy was already owned and at the same time you learn that you were not the "it" guy for her which you are not because if you are, she wouldn't treat you macam anjing which she did and even worse she also painted you as an ugly dog saying "NARF". Now, how would you feel when the person you care so much and you think she felt the same way suddenly treat you that way? The most painful thing that a person can ever say when the other were like "oblivion" : The heart want what the heart want. .......WTF?? :(

I might be wrong in some part but its not my fault to assume what i assume...

I got only few reason to love her but endless reason to HATE her and the most unfair thing is that i still love this girl, and i love to love her which i hate myself and i can't control it...FUUUCCCKKKKK!!!!

ccccooooommmeeeooonnn!! open your heart man!!! the more i try to to move on the more it struck...

There was this one time that i truly move on but the bitch call me back for a weird reason....f*cking fickle a*shole...

She is the most coward, weird, manipulative, ego, mean, childish, selfish, opportunist and pathetic girl that i had ever known, FACT.


...and i don't know why the hell i'm feeling what i am feeling. Being with her is the best thing ever....

I guess i'm not worthy enough for her to admit with my current standard. Let it be as it is, i guess i'm fine this way, really. To be honest i'm still not ready, maybe another ten years till i truly get my self esteem and by that time she will be on my knee begging for mercy ...bwhahahahaahahahahahha (macam sialann xD)

haduhh...i guess imagination is a cure...pphhff

I nailed Crying Lightning and it will be up pretty soon

I'm really derange now.....NARF!

Btw, Durian unveiled their main character:


Goodluck with math exam next week L :')

Sunday, November 15, 2009

Spot on

Done, so i sum up this semester under performance as 'JIWA KACAU'. I think this year is the year that break my routine. It's so different than the last three years. Emotionally as I'm riding a never ending roller-coaster ride. I kinda spend most of my time on my own for the last 6 month and not in the mood for socializing. I guess i should move to my friend's 'rumah sewa' for the next semester which is my final year, I don't know...

I finally get my haircut after a year...bwahahahah xD


Not a very happy face ain't it? :P ...or maybe control macho kot?? ;D

I had to get it because of the exam. The philosophy paper was alright even though i start studying at 1 am until the test. Never ever do that okey....i mean, if you got the time ;P


I was bored so i check my cancer if it match my situation....so i guess, SPOT ON.

Saturday, November 14, 2009:
Normally, you're someone who might pass by an opportunity for an emotional thrill if you believe that it will destabilize your life. But today, you are tempted to choose to ignite the fireworks, even if there's a chance of getting burned. Fortunately, the risk is not as great as it may seem, so give yourself permission now to do something enjoyable that's outside of your regular comfort zone.

Sunday, November 15, 2009: Family responsibilities cannot be avoided now, even if your role is undergoing dramatic changes. You are taking yourself pretty seriously these days, yet something may happen today that lightens your load and brightens your heart. Unexplored possibilities are being presented to you, but this still doesn't free you from previous obligations. Instead of wasting time worrying about what you should or shouldn't do, just express what's in your heart.





Best of luck to you ;D

Monday, November 9, 2009

From outside looking in



...nothing ever happen as you said,
...and thanks god for that...

You are really effing pissed me off...


...again and again and again and
again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again and again.


I swear to you it will never work out.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Alone in the zone

I'm on balaclava btw....

Kinda stretching my limit for these few days.

The things that I'm doing is so experimental and risky. The unknown.

I don't expect to get it to work smoothly but it did, the gear is spinning!


Mutah Darah.....bettooll....






Now it needs a little bit of polishing on the graphic.....hhhmmmm....


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And just now is the suckiest.....


I don't know what is wrong with me but one picture can really do wipe it all out. fuck.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

I can't get enought of her :(









sorry for acting selfish...


ehh...is momo okey???


Sunday, November 1, 2009

Are we there yet?

Oh man...i don't know what to do. Seeing her through the LCD screen unable to get in touch is just killing me...


and cats remind me of her....oooh...god..

btw, notice the ying and yang sign? ;)






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I finally passed up my mix media project:

Through the lonely lane


Internet - assemblage



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Hehehe....kereta sampai last week...but shit...666...


...and bad news, sadly i kinda had my first accident last week when i drove my grandma's nazza.

It got bruised against a lorrie in a tight corner...nasib baik kene sikit, only the door but RM800 goes to waste....damn....if the lorry just wait a couple of second earlier memang lepas...shiitt...


haddooii....this couple of week were just depressing....


One month to go....fuuh~~


i really miss u chubby... :'(